Monday, January 23, 2012

It has been nearly a year since I last wrote a blog. I miss being a blogger. I miss talking to nobody, somebody, a friend, a stranger, an enemy, an imaginary friend, or for that matter, just.. myself...

I was last speaking of my commencement, my worries regarding my future, and all that jazz. That future I was speaking about is finally here-- it is the present moment... and maybe you were wondering, "Hmm, so how did that turn out?" I had been doing "okay", "fine", "could be better", but I received the rejection letter last Monday for an "ideal" post at an "ideal" company. Well hey, at least I got to the final round.

So there goes my BIG dreams, reduced to its negative form. Gone.

I'd say I'm currently going through a big change. I'm dishearteningly depressed in many ways. I feel socially disconnected. I don't like to be around people. I kind of.. hate people. But not in an anti-social way.

I'm uninspired, "de-inspired".

Hmm.. I don't sound very good, do I.

I just don't know what I want, where I want to be, how I want my life.. Maybe I'm overthinking, but I don't have my sense of direction, so, I can't just easily "follow my heart".. What the fuck does that supposed to mean? "Follow your heart".. ????

Not a clue.

(abrupt ending)
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1 comment:

  1. This reminds me a scene in Lost in Translation.

    C: I don't know what I'm supposed to be.
    B: You will figure that out. The more you know who you are, and what you want, the less you let things upset you.

    "Follow your heart" is pretty vague. But you know yourself, and what you do not want to do. So perhaps, that is a start.

    http://www.flickr.com/photos/julianbialowas/6691344013/in/photostream

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